What to do when your child has a tantrum
Big emotional outbursts are common at 2–5. Practical steps to stay calm and help your child learn to handle feelings.
Dropping to the floor, screaming, stamping feet – at this age many children can’t yet put strong feelings into words. Outbursts are often triggered by tiredness, hunger, frustration or wanting to “do it myself”.
During the outburst
- Keep everyone safe. Move your child and others away from anything that could hurt them.
- Stay calm. Keep your voice low and slow. Your calm tells your child “I’m here.”
- Talk less. Long explanations don’t work right now. “I can see you’re really angry. I’m here” is enough.
- Hold the boundary. If the trigger was something you said no to, calmly stick with your no.
Once they’ve calmed down
Give a hug and briefly name what happened: “You wanted the toy and you got cross.” Naming feelings teaches children to use words next time.
What helps in advance?
- Watch sleep and meal routines – tired, hungry children melt down faster.
- Give warnings before transitions: “We’re leaving the park in 5 minutes.”
- Offer choices: “Red T-shirt or blue?”
- When things are calm, explore feelings together with games like “Feelings faces”.
When to seek advice
If outbursts are very frequent, very long, or your child might hurt themselves or others, it can help to talk to your paediatrician or a child psychologist.
These tips are general information — not developmental norms, a diagnosis or individual medical advice. If you have concerns, consult a paediatrician or child psychologist.
